Navigate / search

More Blackthorn Excitement

Thank you to everyone who has shared their support since my announcement on Tuesday. There have been over a thousand views of the press release so far and even features in the Bookseller, Book Brunch and Book2Book. Some fantastic interview spots are also being arranged that I’m really looking forwards to.

But as if I haven’t had enough excitement the last couple of days, my publisher has also sent me the final version of my Blood Shadows book cover! And well, wow. Just wow. That’s been the extent of my descriptive vocabulary since seeing it: Wow. I’ve printed it out on A4 card and it’s currently sat next to me on my desk. I’ve spent all day gazing (and swooning) at it at intervals, reassuring myself it’s real.

Unfortunately I can’t share it with you yet. The reveal is going to happen once my new website is up and running. But read on because I’ll direct you towards some hints shortly!

I mentioned in the last blog post how excited I was to be signed by Bookouture and my book cover is the perfect example of why. Every part of it is bespoke and has been designed specifically with my books and brand in mind.

I had one of those clichéd jaw-dropping moments when I was told who was taking on the Blackthorn project. This designer has worked on covers for bestselling international authors and is very selective. I was beyond fortunate that Blackthorn sparked their imagination enough for them to say yes.

I was even more overwhelmed to find out that ‘project’ meant just that – it wasn’t only about the book cover, there was to be a Blackthorn crest, typography, backdrops, adverts… all things you’ll see on my website in due course. And everything you are going to see will be completely unique. Even the ‘models’ were handpicked and photographed specifically for this book.

It wasn’t just that the designer was fantastic, I was also thrilled to be invited to be a part of it by sharing my vision. I signed up to Pinterest and had fun trying to find images to represent Blackthorn as well as my characters. Finding Blackthorn images was fairly straightforward, finding my characters – not so easy. The challenge with the latter was that I don’t get character inspiration from people I see. And it wasn’t just about finding physical likenesses, I felt it just as important to find the appropriate characteristics such as the look in someone’s eye, their stance or their mood.

So although I can’t show you my cover yet (sorry), if it helps, you can always check out where I’ve been hiding on Pinterest to get some indication of my vision of Blackthorn as well as Blood Shadows’ Kane and Caitlin (Caleb and Leila from Blood Roses are also there – TVD Damon fans be warned!). I’ve also got a personal likes page so feel free to take a look at that too. This is just the start – there will certainly be a lot more coming onto Pinterest soon!

I am absolutely ecstatic about the end result. Aside from the quality and creativity, it’s so perfectly ‘paranormal romance’ with that dark, sophisticated edge I wanted to represent my stories. I could not have envisaged anything better. I welled up when I saw it all displayed out in front of me because I guess part of me still can’t quite believe this is actually happening. The most amazing thing of all is that, as I look at my cover now, I don’t feel like strangers are staring back at me. That’s my Kane and Caitlin there, so close to what I had in my head that it’s spooky.

I can’t wait for you to meet them.

xxx

British Paranormal Romance Author Signs Three-Book Deal!

Yep, that’s me! And I have waited sooo long to be able to say that. 🙂

But let’s cut straight to the chase because I know what you’re here for – you might want to grab a coffee first! Here’s the official press release that just went ‘live’ from my publisher (and there’s information that follows about them too if you scroll through):

So now that I have finished bouncing around the house, stopped clutching my contract to within an inch of its crumpled life (my presh-ussss), and am finally managing to quell the mania for a short while, here’s all the info…

Blood Shadows? What’s Blood Shadows?

Blood Shadows is the re-titled Beguiling the Enemy. So, yes, BTE is going to be the first book released in the series. Beguiling the Enemy was a working title I came up with a few days before subbing to New Voices 2011. The problem was it didn’t tie in with the series and certainly wasn’t as strong as Blood Roses as far as titles go, hence the change. ‘Shadows’ is, of course, because of Caitlin’s shadow-reading ability. Nothing else has changed – it’s exactly the same story.

And as you’ve seen, it’ll be yours as from November the 27th – this year. I may have kept you waiting with the announcement, but at least I won’t be torturing you with the release date!

And Blood Roses?

As you would have seen in the press release, Blood Roses will be yours in Spring 2013, so not too long to wait for that either!

What about the third book?

Autumn 2013! I’ll save the teasers about that for another time but I am bursting with excitement over how it’s working out. Darker, sexier, even more stings in the tail… what you’d come to expect really.

So why Bookouture?

I already knew who Oliver Rhodes was when the request came in for me to sub Blood Shadows and Blood Roses to Bookouture. I knew of his professional reputation in the industry (reinforced by his recent recognition as one of publishing’s ‘Rising Stars’ by The Bookseller). I knew of his impressive background, not least his fantastic work on MIRA and MIRA Ink. I knew New Voices had been his brainchild. So when he contacted me, I was a little overwhelmed to say the least.

What attracted me to this publisher was the principle behind Bookouture. Bookouture are author-centric and totally bespoke. Everything is individual. No fitting in boxes, no restrictive word count, no fitting around everyone else’s timelines. Quality is paramount – from them and the author. Their focus is to build author careers – to work long term with authors who can deliver what readers want. As well as the opportunity to work with some of the very best professionals in the industry, what Bookouture was offering was for me to write the books I wanted to write and they’d be the forward-thinking, talented and creative team that would get them out there. And the clincher for me, the most important thing to me, is that they really love my stories and they believe in me enough to do all of the above. Basically, it was an easy decision.

I feel exceptionally privileged to have been spotted and signed by Bookouture and soon you’ll see why.

If you want to find out more about why Bookouture chose me, please have a look at their website by clicking on the link.

So what now?

It’s been unbelievably busy up to this point but it’s far from over yet! Trust me, the best is yet to come!

There’s going to be an awful lot happening over the next month leading up to the book launch. My website is going to have a MAJOR make-over (it’ll be down for a few days soon) and in due course you’ll be able to see the Blackthorn branding and cover design which have been created by one of THE best designers in the industry. There will also be a book trailer and the first three chapters of Blood Shadows available for you to read as well as so much more…

But before this site closes, I’ll be back in a couple of days to let you know exactly what I think of the Blackthorn branding and cover design once I’ve had a sneak peak! I’m beyond excited.

I’ve already got a few interviews lined up leading up to Christmas so I’m really excited about those too and would love you come and check them out. If you’re reading this and haven’t got a clue who I am but would like to know more, I have a recent interview over on my group blog The Hot Pink Typewriter.

But that’s it for now. Have I missed anything? I’m sure you’ll let me know if I have! Needless to say normal blog duty will be fully resumed once everything is updated and sorted. I’ll have so much to talk about and I’ll be giving away lots more detail, particularly more of my personal perspectives, about what’s been going on in the background as well as what’s to come.

But before I go, for fear of sounding like I’m doing a speech, I do want to thank a few people who have been glued to my side on my journey since New Voices closed and have tirelessly supported this blog:

The amazing Amity Grays, who has been my absolute rock. You may be on the other side of the water and we may never have met, but you’ve done more for me than you’ll ever know. CC Mackenzie, an amazing indie-published author (top 5 in ten countries now and rising!), who dragged me into social media and gave me a hard virtual slap every time my confidence wavered (I have a lot of bruises).

My fabulous cheering squad who are there whenever I need them: Tracey ‘hood-girl’ Rogers, Michelle ‘I’m published by M&B AND Entangled’ Smart, Aimee ‘debut author with too many shoes’ Duffy, Incy ‘says it exactly as it is to perfection’ Black, Sue ‘requested author and, wow, we live in neighbouring villages’ Childs, Tima ‘wonderfully Bloodgifted’ Lacoba, and Sri ‘brand new author for Harlequin Presents’ Pammi. And not forgetting my fabulous fellow Top 4 New Voices ladies who I fought, scrabbled and clawed through the competition with: Natalie Charles, Katie Graham and Charlotte Phillips, who have all been immensely lovely and amazingly supportive since the competition closed.

And thank you to everyone who has tweeted, retweeted, shared, emailed and given shout-outs in the background.

I’d also like to give very special thanks to Michele Hauf who, as we speak, is reading and reviewing Blood Shadows. Please send good vibes her way!

And not least my awesome new publisher Bookouture who deserve a blooming huge cheer for putting us all out of our misery! And wow, am I and Blackthorn in safe hands…

xxx

Relentless.

I’ve buckled under pressure! I never thought I’d see the day when I was nagged into writing a blog post.

Cajoled, stalked, harassed and threatened were a few strategies used, but I finally broke when I was given Puss-in-Boots eyes mid Twitter stream. Yep, this is today’s romance writing community – relentless. And yes, a small fluffy creature works every time. (Hope that doesn’t ruin my vampire-related image?)

There are two reasons I haven’t updated you. The main reason is I haven’t signed yet. I thought slipping in an update in-between would only create groans when you opened the post to find it void of the nitty-gritty.

The second is part is because of SYTYCW. I didn’t want to come across as someone waving from the back of the theatre when everyone else is trying to watch the performance, if you know what I mean. But feeling the pain of those who have entered (yep, having been through it twice with New Voices, I know), being told this might temporarily distract from the angst and tension, I couldn’t refuse.

So here are a few things I can let slip:

First and foremost – no, it’s not Entangled! I’ve been asked that in DMs and emails more than anything else. But they are an epublisher who also does print on demand.

I didn’t sub to this publisher – I was extremely fortunate that they approached me. So getting yourself out there (and making yourself contactable) does get you noticed. Thanks New Voices for giving me the shove!

Yes, they’re fantastic, and yes, I’m chuffed to bits. Once the shock subsided and I had time to read through and discuss the proposal, let alone realise this was actually happening, I had a lot of thinking to do. This was my first offer and, as my work was still sat with others publishers, a huge decision. But the fact they loved the stories, wanted to work with me as an author to build the series and presented me with a clear vision that shared mine, I knew without doubt this was the publisher for me.

The first book due to be published has been revised and has now gone in for line editing. There wasn’t a huge amount to do as it was mainly pulling in the strands of overarching plot lines. Apparently it was all made easier by me presenting a clean manuscript to start with. (I’ve learned that doesn’t mean a ms void of coffee stains.) I’m now working on revisions for book 2.

An amazing cover designer is well underway with the project and I should get to see some samples of work-in-progress next week, so I’m super-excited about that.

And the question I’ve been asked more than any other: Are you going to have to wait long to read the first book? With a big smile, I can say no. Hopefully.

So as I go and hide from any more questions before I drop myself in it, in all sincerity thank you so much for the continued stalking.

I also want to wish my nearest and dearest writing friends all the best with their SYTYCW entries. I think it’s a terrible shame we can’t leave comments like we did with New Voices. I’ve wanted to give feedback so many times. I believe that was one of the best things about NV. I personally benefitted hugely from it – both in terms of gaining reader responses but also getting to know all the writing friends I am now connected with. If it wasn’t for those friends I wouldn’t be on Twitter and certainly wouldn’t be blogging this now.

Enjoy the competition and get those votes in! I know only too well how much every single one means.

Good luck!

And trust me, you don’t have to win…

xxx

3 Book Deal!!!

I can’t believe I’m writing this: I can now make it official that I’ve been offered a three book deal for my Blackthorn Tales series! I emphasise ‘offered’ because this is subject to contract – I haven’t signed yet.

To do a quick recap, I had a request for fulls of both Blood Roses and Beguiling The Enemy (my New Voices entries) back in July. Since then, a lot has been happening in the background. After reading the manuscripts, the publisher confirmed they wanted both books and came back to me with a fantastic proposal that included wanting a third book too! I was delighted with where they wanted to take me as an author and their vision for the Blackthorn Tales. After talking the proposal through with my prospective publisher on the phone, I was left even more impressed by their enthusiasm for the series.

In the interim, I’ve also spoken twice with my superb editor to discuss both books and my plans for the third (as yet unwritten). I’ve already been through the first lot of revisions for one of the books, which is why I’ve been a little quiet lately, and am due to hear back about it in the next couple of weeks.

My contract is on the way so I’ll have to get that checked and then hopefully I’ll be able to sign by the end of the month. If all goes according to plan, I’ll be able to come back at the beginning of October to tell you who I’m going (fingers still crossed) to be published by, why I’m so thrilled to be chosen by them and maybe even give you an indication of when the Blackthorn Tales series will be launched!

I know I’ve said it before, but thank you so much again to everyone for your continued amazing support and kind encouragement this past year. It really does mean a lot to me. It might seem like this has all happened quick, but as I wrote my first paranormal romance when I was 17, this moment has been 21 years in the making. Needless to say I’m going to make the most of it. 😀

xxx

Two Terrific Things

I had two terrific things happen yesterday.

First of all, I had a telephone conversation with my prospective publisher! I still can’t tell you much more, but I wanted to let you know there’s a lot going on in the background and it’s all good stuff. Keep tabs because you’ll hear it here first!

The other terrific thing is completely non-writing related. I’m wary of straying too far off the writing path in my blog posts, but now and again I get the overwhelming urge to include something much more ‘personal’. A particularly personal one (though I know it was still writing related) was the tribute to my dad. Thanks again to everyone who got in touch with me about that. I didn’t anticipate the depth of response I got. And thank you so much for sharing your own personal stories – that really did mean a lot.

As well as writing, I have certain other passions in my life, one of which is animal welfare and wildlife conservation. Last year we moved house and managed to find one with a small patch of woodland. It was a dream come true to have found somewhere where we could actively preserve our own piece of nature. We’ve set up and constructed various habitats from birdhouses, to log and rock piles, nettle patches and even a Tawny Owl box. It’s fairly wild in places, which I love, with some areas totally undisturbed. We’re very lucky to have oak trees – lifeblood for many a species – as well as Holly, Hawthorns and a stunning Ash tree. As you can imagine, I particularly love the latter two for all their magical and mythological connotations and yes, I will confess, I’ve built a fairy garden near one of the Hawthorns (where frogs have now taken up residence).

The best thing of all about moving here was being able to take a more active role in wildlife rehabilitation. Not long after moving in, I was very lucky to link up with an amazing lady who takes in sick, injured or orphaned small mammals, primarily hedgehogs. Anyone who has their finger on the pulse regarding British wildlife conservation will know these shy and harmless little chaps are currently under threat.

Hedgehogs used to be a common sight in the British countryside and gardens, but numbers are plummeting at a scary rate. If it continues, by 2025, they could no longer exist. No one really knows why they’re on the drastic decline, but losing their favoured habitats as well as the increase of farm and garden chemicals (including slug pellets) are all likely contributory factors. Fortunately they’ve long been protected under the Wildlife and Countryside Act so cannot be subject to intentional harm. More recently they’ve been classed as an endangered species so hopefully more active measures will be put in place to protect them.

Hedgehogs particularly like ‘untidy’ gardens (cue us!), with bushes, hedges, leaves and twigs in abundance. Because we have the right environment, we were lucky to be selected as a soft release site as well as being able to help as an overflow rehabilitation place during busy times.

Last year I had three tiny orphaned hoglets transferred to my care. Despite their traumatic start being left alone in their nest after their mum met a tragic end, these two boys and one girl eventually got to healthy weight and were fit enough for release a few weeks later. One of them was released on our patch and still appears to be happily residing with us. That little chap, Mr Orange, is the one at the forefront below (his sister, Miss Pink, is asleep on my arm in the background):

Two weeks ago, two boys came to us. Again, they were orphaned. They were too small to cope on their own, so they’ve been under our supervision. At last night’s pre-dusk weighing, the gorgeous pair weighed in at over 500 grams each, a nice healthy weight for soft release.

I cannot say what an amazing feeling it is to see hedgehogs that probably wouldn’t have otherwise made it, scuttle off into freedom to make their own way. Hopefully they’ll stick around for a while to feast on a few slugs and snails and help salvage what’s left of my ravaged veggie patch (the rest of the wildlife having taken their pick too), or maybe they’ll leg it off into the back field to even greater freedom. The fact remains, they are two more that made it.

That, for me, constitutes terrific news. 🙂

Great News For BTE!

I’ve had another email from my prospective publisher! You certainly can’t fault their communication. So far, it’s second to none.

They have now read Beguiling The Enemy and the terrific news is they liked it! I had no idea what to expect because they’re the first ones to have read it, so I’m sure you can imagine my relief was immense.

In a few days time, they are going to send me a proposal. I cannot wait to read it. My excitement levels are rapidly rising, but I’m still trying to be sensibly contained. Oh, just wait until I tell you the rest… 😀

Thank you so, so much to everyone for your public as well as private messages of support. I really appreciate you sticking with me to share all of this. But please don’t loosen those fingers and toes yet, there’s still a way to go.

I’m off to pinch myself. Again.

xxx

Request!!!

I don’t think I could have asked for a more perfect blog post to follow on from my last.

On Friday 13th July, I received a request from a publisher for a full of both Blood Roses AND Beguiling The Enemy. For all of you who have now picked up on my Repetitive Emailing Checking syndrome, ironically it was a morning when I’d languidly reached for my iphone, switched it on to let it warm up, and even left it for a few moments after it had tinged because I was so convinced it was nothing more than sale-mail or a calendar notice.

The next few minutes were something of a blur as I stumbled sleepy-eyed down the stairs in my pyjamas, handed my phone to my husband and said something along the lines of: “Does that say what I think it does?”

I can’t give you many details at present, but just seven days later, the publisher had read Blood Roses. Not only were they excited about the potential in the book but also in me as an author! If that wasn’t enough, they are now going straight on to read Beguiling The Enemy.

It’s still early days and it’s only just beginning to sink in but I have been itching to share this with you. Hopefully, if all goes well, I’ll be able to give you some more information in due course. No sneaky emails asking me for behind-the-scenes gossip – I can’t tell you anything more!! 😉

To everyone who has been rooting for me, please continue to keep those fingers and toes crossed. For those of you who have been doing so since New Voices 2011, let alone 2010, I hope you’ll be able to return them to normal circulation soon. Goodness knows they deserve the break.

xxx

The Purgatory Of Perfection

I’m my own worst enemy when it comes to perfectionism. This was never instilled in me as a child. It’s completely self-inflicted. But I think I know what influenced it.

My dad was a painter and decorator. He went to art college as a teenager to learn his craft after gaining an apprenticeship. He set up his own business soon after and made it a success over thirty+ years of hard work and determination. He was even headhunted by Laura Ashley, but declined on account of the work taking him away from his young family. My dad loved his job and was exceptional at it.

As a young child and even into my teenage years and early-twenties, I would sit and watch him for hours, often sat cross-legged amongst dustsheets on the floor as he worked. I remember being told stories of the master craftsman at work, not by him, but by others. How he used to paper the ceilings of grand hotels single-handedly, people stopping to watch the speed and perfection with which he worked. He could seamlessly match even the most intricate patterns together on wallpaper because of his exceptional eye for detail. You’d never see a join, smudges in paint or uneven lines. I remember people sliding their fingers over our home’s unblemished silk-like glossed woodwork. Whether he was decorating a stately home or a tiny bungalow, every job was done with pride and care.

I’d often be plotting stories as I watched him. As the only academic in the household, both my dad and mum always wondered where I got my incessant need to read and write. My dad struggled with his literacy. He liked to read but found writing difficult, and spelling was particularly challenging. In that respect, our crafts are at opposite ends of the spectrum. But there were also similarities.

My dad could look at a room, envisage the end product and make that become a reality. He knew how to create mood and atmosphere and where to draw attention. Detail was as important as the wider picture. And he always instilled in me that preparation was key. He’d know if he was going for contemporary or renaissance, warm and cosy or fresh and spacious. He’d strip a room back to the basic framework so he had a decent foundation to start with, then slowly build it up layer by layer. He had an order to things. He wouldn’t spend hours caulking the coving if he hadn’t yet wallpapered the walls. It was only at the end that he’d go through everything with a fine toothcomb, paying attention to all those small details. Then he’d stand back and accept the job was done.

That has always been one of my biggest problems – knowing when to let go. I guess that’s because I’ve made a lot of mistakes over the years with my writing, not least by rushing or floundering because I didn’t prepare. Sacred Dark, my first attempt at a full-length adult novel, was over 150K after years of massacring it. In the end it was the equivalent of my dad papering over badly prepared walls, painting around pictures hoping no one would lift it to look underneath (yes, he knew someone who did that!), and filling in irredeemable cracks with copious amounts of filler. It doesn’t work. When I get cross at the time I wasted over the years, I remind myself it was time spent trying to hone my craft –invaluable time spent learning from my mistakes. At least I finally recognised when to walk away. I wrote books in-between and have now come back with the fresh eyes for Sacred Dark. Needless to say I’ve got a tingle of excitement about it again.

I’m also excited because I know what works for me now. I mustn’t get so caught up in the preparation that I forget to allow my characters to be spontaneous. For them, and subsequently the plot, to take unexpected routes. I like a framework but not for every detail to be planned – I like ideas coming to me as I write. Writing a story is an adventure. I’d like to always treat it as that. Saying that, I keep to the principles my dad shared with me: work hard, do the best job you can and most of all enjoy it.

Five years ago, my dad passed away with a rare form of cancer: aggressive multiple myeloma. It was the anniversary last weekend. For obvious reasons, I struggled to write this blog post then. He was 48 when he was given a few months to live. He fought for seven years – way beyond the survival rate even the specialist working with him predicated. During those terrifying years of small achievements and painful setbacks, he became a pioneer for research into multiple myeloma, agreeing to try procedures even when no-one knew the full extent of the risks. He watched the friends he’d made undergoing the same treatment pass away one by one, but he wouldn’t give up. He was the last survivor. He knew he might not make it, but like he said, because he kept pushing the limits, one day someone would.

Despite what the years of treatment did to him physically, what I will always remember is the person inside. Someone exceptionally brave who wouldn’t quit. The last time I saw him conscious was his 56th birthday. He was sat up in his hospital bed and waved me off and told me he’d see me the following week. I had the phone call from my mum the following morning to make the two-hour journey as quickly as I could. I held his hand until the moment they switched off the life-support machine.

A part of me died that day too. The part that believed everything would be okay in the end. Sometimes it isn’t. And you have to learn to live with that. You learn to tolerate the pain of not getting what you want.

I’ll end with telling you that one of my earliest childhood memories is lying on my parents’ bed, singing a song with my dad. It was my favourite as a little girl. You might know it:

Incy Wincy spider climbed up the water spout.

Down came the rain, and washed the spider out.

Out came the sun, and dried up all the rain

And the Incy Wincy spider climbed up the spout again.

I might have lost a part of me that day, but I gained another. It reinforced in me the will not to give up. Not ever. For years I kept my writing to myself because it never felt perfect enough. Self-doubt is so prevalent in us writers because we live in a world of subjection. I’ve no doubt that, now my submissions are underway, I’ve some hard knocks ahead. Right editor at the right time with the right book to hit the right market is quite a feat. And above all, there’s the possibility no editor/agent will think it’s good enough. Am I prepared for that? No. I don’t think any of us are honestly equipped for rejection. But neither am I equipped not to persist. I’m too much of my dad’s girl for that.

Hot Pink Post

You might remember me mentioning in a previous blog post that I received an invitation to join a new group blog called The Hot Pink Typewriter. It’s hosted by a team of romance writers at various stages of their career – I didn’t realise my invitees meant published, soon to be published or right on the cusp. Those of you who know I exude self-confidence will understand why I was a little intimidated to say the least.

These writers are a fabulous bunch, and posts appear regularly about writing and editing, interviews with authors, personal writing experiences and news of what’s happening in the romance world. This week I’ve written my first ever post on the mechanics of writing and have used a familiar scene from Beguiling The Enemy to illustrate. Please come over and visit if you have time.

xxx

For BTE Fans (No Email Required)

I know I don’t usually blog on a Tuesday, but I wanted to say a massive thank you to everyone who has visited here since Sunday. The truth is I feel really mean making you email me for the chapter I offered. I know it’s extra hassle for you and I really appreciate those who have asked. In the interests of my day job though, I had to err on the side of caution.

Fortunately in this BTE scene I don’t. 🙂

Happy reading and thanks to everyone who continues to support me. xxx

Kane hadn’t even looked at her in the hour or so that had passed. His coldness only made what she was about to do harder. Caitlin clenched her hands in her lap as she watched him from the bed. No time yet had felt like the right time to approach him. But she knew no time would.

    She thought of the witness statements she’d read about his feeding habits. They were as contradictory as everything else produced about him. Some claimed him to be rough, brutal and insatiable, the sex acts that followed the feed equally fierce and self-sating. Others reported him to be sensual and considerate, but still controlling. None ever wanted to prosecute. All were happy to boast of their encounter. All said they’d offer themselves to him again.

    He stubbed out his second cigarette before standing from the sofa. Crossing the room to the kitchen, he re-emerged with a beer and a bottle of water. He placed the latter on the coffee table rather than take it over to her. She wondered if it was her cue to join him.

    Her thudding heart resonated in her ears as she forced herself off the edge of the bed. She stepped over to the sofa opposite his, tentatively sitting on the edge.

    Kane took a mouthful of beer, the solemnity in his eyes telling her she hadn’t been forgiven even if his anger had dissipated.

    She knew she couldn’t hesitate or she’d lose her nerve. ‘If you tell me what killed my parents, I’ll let you feed.’

    He lifted his eyebrows slightly in faint amusement. ‘Excuse me?’

    ‘You heard me.’

    ‘Yeah, I heard you. I just want you to say it again.’

    ‘It’s a fair exchange.’

    ‘You’re offering to let me feed? On you?’

     She nodded.

    ‘What happened to the systems and protocols?’

    ‘I want a name, Kane. I need to know.’ She dug her nails deeper into her perspiring palms. ‘Before you’re going to do whatever it is you’re planning to do, I want to know what it is.’

    He lifted his bottle steadily to his lips, took a slow mouthful then lowered it again, his gaze not flinching from hers as he subtly licked away the remnants. ‘I’d need to control you for every moment of the feed. Are you sure you can take that?’

    She couldn’t let her gaze falter. ‘More than sure.’

    Her stomach flipped at his flicker of a smile as he reverted his attention back to the TV.

    ‘This is not an open-ended offer, Kane.’

    He was a vampire. It should have been the easiest thing in the world to tempt him to bite.

    ‘What’s the problem?’ she asked, her tone laced with an urgency she hadn’t intended.

    His eyes snapped to hers again. ‘The problem is that I could forget myself, Caitlin. I could decide I want more than just your blood. Like you said, if I do anything you don’t like, it could jeopardise my plans. And believe me, during a feed I could do a lot of things you don’t like.’

    There was a stirring low in her abdomen at the threat, but she forced herself to focus on the significance of what else he’d said. ‘So you do need to get to my heart.’

    He narrowed his eyes slightly. ‘You do know what goes on in a dual feed, don’t you? A master vampire gets you to the height of arousal until all that built up energy gets fit to explode and then he bites – hard and fast. And just as you climax, at that exact moment, he drinks, taking every last shred of energy. You don’t remember who you are, where you are, you don’t even care. Humans can’t survive it. Even you shadow-readers, with your constantly self-generating energy, can only take so much. And I’m capable of taking more than you can even imagine.’

    She refused to look away despite every facet of common sense screaming at her to retreat. ‘But you won’t forget yourself, will you? Not if your need for vengeance is that strong.’

    ‘That’s still one hell of a risk you’re willing to take.’

    ‘I have nothing to lose, do I?’

    Her chest tightened as he held her gaze for an uncomfortable couple of seconds.

    ‘And you thought me trying to seduce you was tragic,’ he said. ‘You offering yourself to me in exchange for information you won’t be able to do anything with is what’s tragic, Caitlin.’ He lifted his bottle back to those sexy, bow lips. ‘It almost breaks my heart.’

    She slid her hands from her lap to grip the sofa either side of her thighs. ‘I just want to know what it is.’

    ‘You really want to trade that flawless skin for information you can do nothing with?’

    ‘Do you really want to turn down a free feed?’

    He licked the bottom of his lip as his gaze swept from her throat to her mouth. ‘I’d want to bite you full on,’ he declared, the intensity behind those navy eyes as they locked on hers telling her he meant every word. ‘No numbing. I’d want you to feel me go in. And I will hold you down. I can’t risk those magic fingers wandering.’

    She nodded despite knowing he was still angry enough to make this difficult for her. But she knew if she pulled away now, she was unlikely to regain the courage to offer herself to him again.

    Kane assessed her carefully for a few moments longer before pushing the coffee table aside with his foot, freeing the space between them. He placed his drink on the floor and leaned back, draping his arms over the back of the sofa. ‘Come here,’ he said, his gaze resting squarely on hers.